Verse: 1 Peter 3:1-2 (ESV)
1 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they see your respectful and pure conduct.
If you are new to the Bible, verses like this can be difficult. It is important to read it in the context of the whole biblical narrative. And sadly, some churches have done a poor job of this. If you read this and wonder, “what is going on?”, please reach out to Christian. He would be happy to explain it as thoroughly as you’d like!
Devotion
Bear with me, ladies. This one is going to require that we lay a little groundwork.
As we head into Chapter 3, Peter is continuing his theme of Christians submitting themselves to earthly authorities: citizens to government, servants to masters, now wives to husbands. To understand why this relationship would be grouped together with those others, we need to first review the parameters God put in place regarding the institution of marriage.
– A husband and wife are “one flesh” (Gen. 2:24 – echoed by Jesus in Matt. 19 and Mark 10) – a husband that views his wife as a part of his own body will love, respect, nurture, protect, and care for her as he does himself.
– Christ’s relationship with the church is the archetype on which the marriage relationship is modeled (Ephesians 5:22-33) – the husband is responsible to love his wife as Christ loves the church, even to the point of being willing to die for her. In other words, the commands for marriage cut both ways. The church at large, to its own detriment, has often focused only on one side. But the biblical model of marriage calls for a two way reciprocal model of laying our lives down for each other in marriage.
Ladies, imagine if your husband could live up to these standards!
But Peter specifically addresses women whose husbands “do not obey the word”. It’s left to the reader to determine whether this refers to Christian women who have married non-believing husbands, women who got married and then came to Christ but their husband hasn’t, or just the inability of even believing husbands to sufficiently follow Christ’s example. I think we can rule out the final category because of the way Peter continues by saying “they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives”. What could he mean by “won” other than to be won to Christ? Which of course wouldn’t be necessary with a husband who is already in Christ.
So we can infer then, that Peter is instructing wives with unbelieving husbands to make their homes their mission fields. That by their “respectful and pure conduct”, they might convince their husbands (without the need for verbal debate) of the merits of following Christ. This may be as the result of a change in behavior when the wife comes to Christ, or simply in comparison to other wives who don’t know Christ. And surely, the effect wouldn’t be limited to the husband, as neighbors, friends, and relatives would observe the interactions as well.
But let’s not miss a couple of key points here:
1) Peter tells wives to “be subject to your own husbands”. Not to all men, not to other women’s husbands. When you marry your husband, you are willingly entering a covenantal relationship which comes with responsibilities that are specific to the two of you. You are agreeing to subject yourself (as he is agreeing to lay his life down for you), because it is how God has constructed the marriage relationship.
2) There is an important distinction to be made between subjection/submission and obedience. Scripture is clear that for believers, God remains, at all times, our primary authority. At no time are we to blindly follow the commands/instructions/requests of those with earthly authority, when they are in conflict with God’s commands. What we are to do, however, is to respectfully accept whatever consequences may arise from the disobedience to those authorities that following God may sometimes require of us. Whether citizen, servant, wife, employee, child…we honor God by first obeying him, but then by honoring those to whom he has given authority.
Prayer
Lord, help me to love my wife like Christ loves his Church. May I never put her in a position to be in conflict with your demands. Help me to be an example to her and those around me as I submit to the authorities you have placed in my life. And help me to honor her by remembering that she was yours long before she was ever mine. Amen.
Author: Dave MacDonald
Recent Comments